A Holiday Gripe

(Note: The following article was inspired by both a conversation with Abby last night, and this entry in her blog posted this week. The section on public vs. private prayer is also inspired by an op-ed piece written by Roger Ebert last year, which I would also link to, but I can’t find it anywhere.)

To our Christian friends who are trying to proclaim that the use of “Happy Holidays” is part of a vast conspiracy to eliminate Christmas…please stop.

The fact that we have a few extremist Christians claiming religious persecution is so deliciously ironic that it should be served on crackers at cocktail parties. I mean, jeepers, six million Jewish people just disappear off the face of the Earth between 1941 and 1945, all because of their religious beliefs. Nowadays, some folks get their panties in a bunch because a phrase mentioning their holiday is not the default greeting at Target. Somehow, it just doesn’t equate.

First of all, “Happy Holidays” has been in use for years. Long before it had any connotations of being a relatively “religion-neutral” phrase, in my world the term was primarily used to refer to both Christmas and New Years - back in the days when us small-minded folks didn’t even stop to consider the fact that there were many peeps around the world who didn’t take Christ as their savior. “Season’s Greetings” was used much the same way. So the argument can’t be against the phrase, but rather the context which it’s being used in, or rather, the phrase it is being used in place of.

Secondly, I’m pretty sure these folks haven’t even tried to consider that “Happy Holidays” isn’t excluding their beliefs at all, nor minimizing them. The phrase is being used in an effort to acknowledge the validity and value of the holidays celebrated by many different belief structures, which Christianity is quite obviously one of. It’s not shutting you out, it’s letting other folks in. I haven’t heard anyone say “Happy Holidays, Unless You Celebrate Christmas” yet.

When a stranger says “Merry Christmas” to me, I smile and nod and thank them. I do not turn a cold shoulder and sneer at their wish. I know they mean no harm. I just think that if they took a little time and gave a little thought to what they were saying, they would realize that what they are being just a little bit presumptuous and exclusionary. By assuming that I am Christian and therefore open to the greeting which they give, they are, in some small way, assuming that their beliefs are somehow more valid than others.

The same difference can be drawn between private and public prayer, another hot-button issue in our society. Private prayer is between yourself and God, Allah, Buddha, Michael Eisner, or whatever you choose to worship, if you choose to worship anything. It’s a personal issue, and does not presume that others would care to join you. Public prayer, however, is a different matter. It is designed not only to bring together people who share a common belief, but by proxy, exclude those who choose not to participate in it. Even when preceded by a quick “anyone who doesn’t wanna take part can step out” to cover their proverbial backside, initiating such an event must mean that one readily believes that most of those present share the same basic belief structure, otherwise they’d simply pray by themselves. At some level, the very act of initiating a common prayer can be read as an act of arrogance.

Same basic concept here. And now the arrogance is confounded by the stubborn refusal of a few Christians out on the lunatic fringe refusing to see the use of a innocuous phrase like “Happy Holidays” as anything but an outright affront to what they believe. By gum, you better say “Merry Christmas” or I’ll never shop at your store again! Okay, then what? If I don’t somehow acknowledge Easter when that rolls around, you’ll skip town, too? What about All Saints Day? That one doesn’t get much play nowadays! Shall we add that one to the canon? Take it to its logical extreme, and these folks are basically insisting we tailor our speech to suit their beliefs alone. “Melting Pot” be damned, I guess.

Listen folks, I think we’re losing sight of a lot of things, here. Let us not forget what this wondrous season is truly about: money. Yep, the almighty dollar. A mass-marketed, corporately driven merry-go-round of homogenized cheer and wonderment designed to separate as many of us from as many of our little green pieces of paper as possible. No matter what the holidays USED to mean in society, to ANYONE, that definition has long since gone the way of the dodo. Heck, as far as I’m concerned, there is no season more American than this one. Oh, sure, Thanksgiving may be about family and brotherhood and togetherness, and the Fourth of July may be about shooting little sticks of nitroglycerine into the sky and watching them go boom, but in the end, this is truly where the heart and soul of a capitalist society lies.

But outright cynicism aside, what allows an Optimistic Pessimist™ like me to relax and enjoy the season is the spirit in which it is intended by the individuals participating in it. For those of us who don‘t have a financial stake in the holidays, the joy comes in giving - showing our love for others by doing something special, to let them know how much they mean by giving a present, baking a cookie, sending a card, or just seeing them and giving them a hug. As someone who gives a lot at this time of year, nothing does my heart gladder than to see someone I care about smile and say thank you, no matter what I did for them - and any season which gives me the chance to do that, and do it often, is a wonderful time, no matter what I do or don’t believe in.

That, truly, is the Reason for the Season: Giving out of love and respect to those who have enriched our lives, and being enriched in return simply through the act of giving. Perhaps the few Christian brethren who seem intent on finding fault in an innocently intended phrase should reflect for a second on the fact that, at some level, saying “Happy Holidays” is giving - giving worth and consideration to those who might not believe exactly what you do. What could be more Christian than that?

As a few great philosophers on a sadly long-lost TV show once opined:

“So, let’s have peace on Earth and cut out all the bull,
Let’s have a holiday season that’s multicultural
If there’s one point we’d like to make with this festive holiday song
It’s that Christmas comes but once a year, so for a few days, for crying out loud,
Can’t we all just get along?”

Marvel Versus #138: Juggernaut vs. Apocalypto!

And just so we can make it a hat-trick of entries on this day:

Mel Gibson News Bite #1 and Mel Gibson News Bite #2.

A few random thoughts:

Executive producing a Holocaust drama. Either he's trying to atone for the idiotic things his dear old dad has been spewing, or he'll commit career suicide by agreeing with him. Or...ta da...he'll do neither, and the flick will be a relatively banal piece which neither outright confirms nor denies the events, but simply uses them as a backdrop to tell a heartwarming story about heroic gentiles. By jove, I think we've got it.

And as far as "Apocalypto" - if he really thinks audiences are clamoring for more impenetrable ancient languages in movies, he's got another thing coming. My gut reaction is that, without audiences being sold that it's important for their religion that this movie be a success, this particular flick will go down faster than a prostitute at a Republican convention.

And come on - "Apocalypto?" It just SOUNDS like a rejected X-Men villain, doesn't it?

Okay, now it's MySpace again

Apparently MySpace was having some problems-something-fierce with their server, and everything's okay now. Why a problem would manefest itself to say, "Your profile has been deleted" when it hasn't, that's anybody's guess.

Engagements, Engagements Everywhere, and Not MySpace No More...

Feeling like Miles in "Sideways" - "Last year, it was all divorces, this year it's all weddings."

To wit, I have been present at one engagement in the past month, got together for dinner with another pair of fiancees last night, and have in, rapid succession, been notified of two more - both Lisa and E. Sean are getting hitched. Add into that the many happy relationships that so many of my buds find themselves in nowadays, and the end result is twofold: being very happy for everyone, because they're happy, and being incredibly envious and depressed, because I'm not. Not yet, anyway. Sigh...

And just to add to the fun, I find out that my MySpace account has been deleted, without me being notified, and with no discernible reason that I can fathom. An e-mail to the proper authorities has yielded no answer as of yet. What the h-e-double hockey sticks?

Da Links!

Yes, for the first time in, oh, a year or so, I decided to redo that thar sidebar and replace all the outdated and dead links with shiny new ones! Yay for new things!

So, most all the blogs I read regularly are on there now. If a.) yours isn't and you want it to be, or b.) yours IS and you wish it wasn't, lemme know!

Snoopgate

An excellent commentary on the scandal is right here.

"The fact that we are discussing this program is helping the enemy."

The "enemy" he's referring to is, of course, the Democratic Party.

Right now Heather must feel a lot like Ian Malcolm in Jurassic Park: "Damn, I hate being right all the time."

Anybody on MySpace?

I am!

So, who else is also on there so I can get some friends and not look quite so pathetic? :)

P.S. - King Kong is incredible. See it. Now.

Any Holidays I'm Missing?

I'm planning a big, massive greeting for the Director's Halls this week in which I will be wishing Happy Holidays to everyone...and trying to include almost EVERY possible holiday celebrated in the U.S. (Well, most of them...I'm leaving out a lot of the really silly holidays like "National Jeans Day"...except when I think they'd be funny to say in this context.) Here's the list I have going right now - if anyone knows of any holidays (real or pop-culture inspired) that should also be included, please let me know!

Christmas
Channukah
Kwanzaa
Ramadan
Winter Solstice
Advent
Yule
Festival of Lights
Candle Mass
Hogmanay
Vartusht - No - Diso
El Dia de Senora Guadelupe
Beethoven Day
Boxing Day
Forefather’s Day
Gorilla Suit Day
Human Rights Day
Louisiana Purchase Day
National Brownie Day
Nobel Prize Day
Pearl Harbor Day
Poinsettia Day
Rosa Parks Day
Sister-Friend Day
St. Switten’s Day
Teacher Appreciation Day
Victory Day
Wear Brown Shoes Day
World Peace Day
Decemberween
Life Day
Festival of Kot’Baval
Festivvus
or, Nothing at All

And a Happy New Year!

The 200th Post!!!!

And now, for all those who came late, a taste of all the things I’ve spent the last year, one month, 28 days and seven hours writing about…

1. For all those who wanted me to get off my duff and update my old blog, well, sorry, but that one's gone the way of the dodo.
2. I am so full of joy right now, it makes no sense.
3. It's like I turned my back and pop culture sprung a fast one on me.
4. Think that headline will get me a few more hits from the Blogger database? :)
5. James Williams is the coolest guy alive!
6. It twas off to Cincinnati to see the lovely and talented Melissa Bennett in the Clear Stage Cincinnati production of Romeo and Juliet yesterday.
7. In this tumultuous and anger-filled election season, maybe what we all need is a good laugh.
8. It was a political-rally-as-rock-concert.
9. Can't really say much about the showing...we went, we stood in line and hugged my aunt and the rest of the family, then we went home.
10. Hope she doesn't mind me posting this here, but Heather wrote me an e-mail outlining her own thoughts on the Paris Hilton discussion, and I found them interesting enough to share with the rest of ya...
11. For the record, I have never believed in curses, much less curses applied to baseball.
12. This is weird.
13. Check this out.
14. You know, a scant hour ago I supported John Kerry in this election 100%.
15. A few random thoughts on this, perhaps my favorite of all holidays...
16. Heather's gonna hate me for posting this link, but it's just too funny and so amazingly mean-spirited, I can't resist...
17. You know, there are few feelings more satisfying than to find out that your job has been done for you.
18. Well, we tried.
19. Holy cow, does it feel like WWE is in disarray right about now.
20. Sorry for the sudden and unannounced lack of updates, but it's been a long weekend.
21. A few random musings, whatever comes to mind as I type...
22. Snuck in and saw this one this afternoon after getting off work, and it's pretty good.
23. One more before the evening is out, as I went with my bro and the lovely and talented Heather Waterfield to see this one this evening.
24. Methinks I'll keep this up, if there are no objections, as I'd like to sharpen my critical muse a bit, just to see if it hasn't atrophied.
25. There's a lot of things to talk about today, and maybe I'll get to 'em later.
26. First things first...mega, huge, colossal congratulations to the lovely and talented miss Abby Bollenbacher for being named Miss Northwestern Ohio over the weekend!
27. So, I decide to bite the bullet and go ahead and buy the game this afternoon, since I am gonna be stranded at home for the next week anyway, and I need something to kill the time with.
28. BTW, another shout-out to my dear amiga Abby, reigning Miss Northwestern Ohio, who if you didn't know, has now opened a blog of her own:
29. In anticipation of the arrival of the Strong Bad DVD set, and to serve as an introduction to some of my friends who may not be as familiar with HomestarRunner.com, here's a list of my 10 favorite SB emails from that first 100, in chronological order.
30. A little messing around with my template gives me a links section of my very own.
31. "Come, my friends,‘Tis not too late to seek a newer world.
32. So, I've decided to start doing DVD reviews on here as well, just to broaden the reviewing palate a little.
33. Well, I've got a big weekend ahead of me at work, just long enough to introduce a new feature on here that is of no interest to anyone but me.
34. Got off work early so I can add two things before I go to bed...
35. Just wanna take a moment to respond to the lovely and talented Lindsey Ruehl's question about my attempt to lose weight...why not Atkins?
36. Croissanwich and OJ from BK for breakfast, Almond Boneless Chicken, Rice and Gravy, and Diet Coke for lunch, Tendercrisp Chicken Sandwich and Diet Coke for Dinner, bowl of Apple Jacks for midnight snack.
37. Got a look at the Chatters' lounge at work, and it looks like a really nice place (not that I'D eat there, given the prices), but in looking at the menu, I found that my esteemed employers apparently felt obligated to stick with the motif of their main business in naming the drinks on sale.
38. No breakfast, Tendercrisp Chicken Combo for lunch, small bag of beef jerky for snack, four slices of pizza and two breadsticks from Pizza Hut for dinner (not proud of that), bowl of Apple Jacks for midnight snack.
39. So, we take the ups with the downs in life.
40. I decided I didn't like the 3D's being posted here on the main page, as it just seemed like something that was breaking up the rhythm of the page, and I realized that some folks might find it a distraction.
41. Went with the lovely and talented Heather Waterfield and saw this one this evening, and thoroughly enjoyed it.
42. Just a quick one as I write on this late Thursday evening, in the wee hours of what is actually my favorite holiday.
43. My own personal Turkey day is complete.
44. Working at the box office at a major movie theatre, you begin to see...patterns.
45. Surprise! :)
46. A super-duper congratulations to da man, Brett Favre, who will start his 200th consecutive game tonight on Monday Night Football.
47. Heather brought my attention to this story today....
48. I am thrilled to be able to announce that on November 23rd, Chris and Kristi Poltrone, two of my dearest friends and some of the best people on the planet Earth, welcomed into their family their first child, Allison Nell Poltrone.
49. The Metal Gear Solid folks always seem to fit in at least one flat-out "mess with your mind" moment per game (in the case of MGS2, that phrase describes basically the entire plot), and as I have just learned, MGS3 is no exception.
50. I have a few things I'd like to talk about, but in lieu of offending people with my thoughts on...certain issues, I'd like to turn my attention to the world of sports.
51. Snagged this from Heather W's blog, 'cuz thought it was a cool idea, so here ya go (with ones I have done in bold, and comments in parenthesis)...
52. First things first, the lovely and talented Miss Abby Bollenbacher has updated her Being Miss Northwestern Ohio blog with a fascinating entry about the nature of the Miss America scholorship program and what goes into its make-up.
53. Double your pleasure, double your fun, two reviews for the price of one!
54. Each day, you learn a little something. For example, today *I* learned...
55. I need to re-watch the show to make sure what I'm about to say is indeed appropriate, but I figure I might as well write about what I'm feeling now.
56. Having a car of my own again gives me a few opportunities not available to me a scant few days ago.
57. Those of you who remember the first blog will remember this post, as it originally appeared there over a year ago.
58. If I said that "Ocean's Twelve" was a fun ride, but not quite up to the level of the first film, that'd be accurate.
59. So I was awoken yesterday by the lovely and talented Diane Shannon , asking me if there were any tree farms around BG.
60. It's so much easier when they're there to guide your hand.
61. Okay, this update's pretty much just for Heather, as she's the biggest H2G2 fan I know, but after posting the bit about the Hitchhiker's trailer, I decided to do a little snooping on imdb to find some info about the flick, as I had yet to actually do.
62. Evaluating as we get toward the end of the year at the movies, since we're rapidly approaching award season and I wanna know where I stand.
63. Click here.
64. Been a while, I admit, since an update on either this or the 3D, but this has been a chaotic few days, in more than a few ways.
65. Back in 1996, I was a writer for a little online wrestling newsletter.
66. So, I'm on the blog of Scott Keith a few days ago, and he posts a quick review of WWE's Smackdown show in Iraq.
67. Yes, ladies and gentlemen, you not only get my first update in forever, but you get four, count 'em, FOUR Q'n'D movie reviews in one post!
68. First off, a very happy new year to everybody and hope that 2K5 treats you wonderfully well.
69. A few thank yous to be spread around, to many of my dearest peeps, and their effect on my life in 2004:
70. I spent the last two days alone in a hotel room with an older woman.
71. For those of you who ever wanted, for some crazy reason, to hear me sing in public, this is your chance:
72. A weird thought experiment to end a weird day - me and my brother were watching some episodes of the A-Team on DVD tonight, and we got into a discussion of the inevitable movie which will come.
73. We're sitting at about a month away from the BGSU Rumble, and for the first time I can remember, we won't be scrambling for participants at the last minute - we already have a a full boat of 30 as we speak!
74. After taping all four hours of this Sunday/Monday's 24 multi-episode marathon beginning to the new season, I finally got a chance to sit down and watch it all tonight, thanks to finally having a reasonably free evening, and with judicious use of the FF button on my VCR (not just during commercials, but during any sub-plots which are pretty obviously going nowhere).
75. So, at the theatre now we have these new plasma screen TVs.
76. So, today's project was to beef up my lagging efforts as a member of the Friendster website, as part of my ongoing project to broaden my circle of friends (and, who knows, come across someone who might wanna become something more than that...but such is the unspoken hopeful prologue).
77. I wasn't gonna watch any of the inauguration today, but work made it unavoidable by putting it on the TV in the lobby.
78. I got suckered into leaving an answer to this on Heather's blog, so I'll take a shot and post it here...and, hey, I'm curious as to what I'll get...
79. Yes, ladies and gentlemen, the moment you've awaited for years has arrived, and we may celebrate the coming of the end of the world - someone has called me an @$$hole, and they meant it.
80. Heather just called with the news that Johnny Carson passed away this morning.
81. Roger Ebert has already posted a lovely remembrance of Johnny here.
82. "We're sure that The Tonight Show will be running plenty of Carson tributes this evening.
83. Okay, I just woke up and am looking at da nominees for the first time.
84. Sometimes you get to an odd place, where you know what you believe and why, but you can understand why others feel differently and can feel sympathy toward their position.
85. Yes, folks, the BGSU Rumble will be THIS FRIDAY at 10 p.m. (check your e-mailboxes for location and details, or if you didn't get the e-mail, lemme know and I'll re-send it to you).
86. Heather is gonna kill me for telling this to you all, but I can't resist.
87. A few things to regale you all with on this fine Saturday evening...
88. I have decided that I play the game of my life as I play poker - which, on the whole, is not a good thing.
89. The story you are about to read is true.
90. To Mr. Jim Emerson, editor of RogerEbert.com;
91. Figured you guys would enjoy this...
92. Valentine's Day may be a construction, but the feelings it represents are real.
93. As with the previous survey thing I posted, I got this from Lia, who in turn got it from her friend zOmb1.
94. Dear Dr. Thompson,
95. So we get the word at work tonight that a group of teenagers has written a letter to the home office of our theatre that they're planning to come in to either our place or Levis-Commons.
96. I just had the single best burger I've ever tasted in my life...and the kicker is, I made it myself.
97. If you didn't see it, Bill Maher's latest "New Rules" commentary from his HBO show featured an unspeakably brilliant closing monologue on a recent survey of high schoolers.
98. Okay, we're two days out, time for final Oscar predictions and preferences.
99. Don't have much time this afternoon, but here are a few quick reactions to the Oscars...
100. Here's a complete list of winners, as well as my picks, per Abby's request.
101. Just when I thought I could relax...
102. Allow me to present a succinct summary of the whole debate about display of the ten commandments in courthouses and government buildings, from Penn and Teller and their classic Showtime series, "Bulls#!t"...
103. Note: The following is pretty much a rant.
104. Courtesy Lia's blog, I present...The Goth Name Generator.
105. Quick update as I'm in the middle of a packed week with little if any free time.
106. In the spirit of the WB's...um...modest re-imagining of the Looney Toons characters in their new fall cartoon "Loonatics,"allow me to present some equally...modest proposals for other classic characters in need of a similar "updating."
107. http://www.boxofficemojo.com/weekend/chart/
108. Check it out.
109. I hadn't checked the blog in a few days and just noticed how that post about the Commonly Confused Words quiz completely screwed up everything on the page.
110. I've never been one to celebrate St. Patty's day, despite my Irish ancestry and the prominent "Mc" at the beginning of my last name.
111. Okay, spoilers aplenty coming, so if you haven't seen either of "The Ring" movies and wanna be surprised, please look away.
112. I am suddenly battling with my depression all over again, and in an effort to combat it I am posting something I've been sitting on for a while for no reason I can figure out - a compliation of some of the greatest Roger Ebert quotes from his reviews of bad movies.
113. Check this one out.
114. Going back in time a bit to my days as a wrestling online commentator for this entry...for 'tis time to pick 'em for WrestleMania 21, coming up this Sunday.
115. You can ask Heather.
116. I didn't know.
117. Courtesy Lia's blog, I'm daring ALL of you to try this one (not that I think many of you will).
118. (First of all, am I the first to note the irony that Blogger is having problems with the Problems page?)
119. 29.95 at Best Buy, and the complete Sledge Hammer legacy is now mine.
120. Well, maybe the problem with the quiz is it's too hard.
121. Well, we're down to nine songs left, and so it's a perfect time for me to throw a monkey into the wrench and switch things up a bit.
122. With 12 outta the 20 possible songs correct, no one can catch her, so Lindsey is da winnah!
123. Would you look at that!
124. This was a complicated week on a few fronts, hence my sudden lack of updates since the 19th.
125. I dig this idea, again from Lia's blog, so here it goes...
126. Welcome back to the show that never should have ended.
127. The lovely and talented Lindsey asked me dese questions on her blog, and here are my answers.
128. "anything with jessica mitolo had to have sucked."
129. Sorry to disappoint and end all speculation, but my absence has not been because I have been in pursuit of Jessica's defamer (the search still ongoing, by gum), but rather because I was in Chicago!
130. Well, I haven't updated in quite a few days.
131. This was a day where everything went wrong.
132. On the whole, the LOTR crowd was more fun, less rowdy, and allowed me to talk without shouting quite as loud as I had to tonight.
133. At last, George Lucas has made another Star Wars movie.
134. So I go into work on Friday.
135. Asking a favor of everyone...my dear friend, the lovely and talented Abby Bollenbacher, is auditioning to become "The Face of Fox Toledo," and has made it to the round of sixteen!
136. 1.) Bold what is true.
137. Two things...
138. Really quickly, I saw LY with my bro, the lovely and talented Beth Wander, and two of her friends today, and was pleasently surprised by how much I enjoyed it.
139. "Madagascar" is the lowest-attended $61 million-dollar grossing movie I've ever seen at the theatre.
140. #1. To date, what accomplishment, personal trait or event you were involved in are you most proud of and why?
141. I am writing this on a library computer, for my home connection has been spotty at best and damn annoying at worst, usually kicking me off after but a minute of use for the last two weeks.
142. A summary of the weekend's events for all y'all interested...
143. (whistles)
144. I recieved word this morning at 10:30 or so.
145. It's been a hectic and trying few weeks, not the least of which including a total computer meltdown and this past weekend, in which pretty much everything went wrong.
146. I'm BACK, baby!
147. Number A, we salute Matt Hirth, whose character Jonni Mooch won the Jack Sparrow Memorial Tournament on August 13th.
148. I guess I just wanna know what I've been missing out on, so I've been trying, like, EVERY DVD I own in da Compy...and finding that I really haven't been missing out on much.
149. On Thursday afternoon, on Chris Jericho's Official Web Page, the usual opening graphic was replaced by a shot of him standing in front of a TNA logo.
150. In lieu of answering Lindsey's "Song's I'm Enjoying" challenge (no CD player in my car means I'm not enjoying many songs, really) here, in random order, are a few things in pop culture I'm digging right now:
151. Turned out to be a lovely evening at J and Stephy's this evening, as what looked like a relatively limited get-together to teach Heather how to play the game turned into the first flat-out full-on poker night in which I've taken part in years.
152. If there is any concept that I truly dislike, it is that of “conventional wisdom,” specifically when it is applied to moviegoing.
153. Check this out.
154. So, Simpsons Season 6 came out a few weeks ago.
155. Stuff and stuff on this Labor Dabor…
156. Good news: I now have DSL connection so the net is uber-fast.
157. Before the Eagles/Falcons game, there was a brawl on the field which resulted in Jeremiah Trotter and Kevin Mathis (I only know the names because Matt was standing next to me when I typed them) and being ejected.
158. So rang the chant for the AJ Styles/Samoa Joe/Christopher Daniels match at the Unbreakable PPV.
159. AJ Styles's Official Page.
160. Online reaction to the move seems to be overwhelmingly negative, with folks writing off TNA's whole run on Spike TV as a result.
161. So, Dan Patrick's radio show this afternoon on ESPN Radio.
162. Memories I will take from the summer of Ought Five:
163. Obituary here.
164. First off, "Family Guy presents Stewie Griffin: The Untold Story."
165. http://vicesforvictims.blogspot.com/
166. 50 years ago tonight, a television show debuted that would have an impact on its genre, its medium, and its society forever.
167. Sitting at Greg's computer in the Condo, a quick update of the weekend's events before I crash...
168. 1. initials: JAM
169. 1. FIRST NAME? Jeff
170. Read.
171. So, WWE cans the only good announcer Raw has anymore, Jim Ross, shipping him to WWE.com, even though the one guy they had earmarked to take over the slot (UFC announcer Mike Goldberg) has since declined their offer and they now have no one in mind to take over.
172. This woman is sitting outside in the hall today at work.
173. Check it out.
174. Yep, it's done.
175. From Yahoo News...
176. Check it out.
177. According to Planet Family Guy, the show gets satirized on the cover of this month's issue of Mad Magazine, drawing each of the characters as a member of the Simpsons cast and proclaiming Family Guy "the most original show on television."
178. Been a long week of many events but few of actual consequence in the life of Jeff McGinnis, hence the lack of a pull to really write anything.
179. Congrats to Family Guy AND American Dad for being given the highest honor of all: being named the worst shows on TV by the Parent's Television Council!
180. We have a new list of the Best Movies Ever from that quintessential source, Total Film Magazine.
181. Roger's review of "Legend of Zorro."
182. A long night at the theatre summed up in a few sentences.
183. Read Roger's Movie Answer Man column for this week.
184. Okay, I am not usually one to relate “I won” stories, but this one is too good.
185. I liked the last few days.
186. It is my honor to announce that my dear friend Abby Bollenbacher was crowned Miss Maumee Valley tonight!
187. Mega-huge congratulations to my dear friends Stephanie Ruehl and J. Michael Bestul for getting engaged yesterday!
188. I found out early this afternoon from PWInsider.com that Eddie Guerrero was found dead in his hotel room in Minneapolis today.
189. The announced cause of death was heart disease aggravated by his past years of drinking and drug abuse.
190. A grand good morrow and happiest of Thanksgivings to everyone!
191. I am thankful for Andy for being one of the coolest dudes on the planet to talk movies with.
192. At the McGinnis Household, I've come to think of the Thanksgiving turkey in the same way that others may view, say, Groundhog Day.
193. http://forbes.codefix.net/capsule/
194. And the news story that will make you most sick today is...
195. 1. What time is it: 11:39 p.m.
196. (WARNING: The following review is basically nothing but one, big spoiler.
197. If you read this, if your eyes are passing over this right now, (even if we don't speak often) please post a comment with a COMPLETELY MADE UP AND FICTIONAL memory of you and me.
198. This one ain't mine, but it's a good one, anyway...
199. And now, some news stories out there that aren't airline-related tragedies:
200. And now, for all those who came late, a taste of all the things I’ve spent the last year, one month, 28 days and seven hours writing about…

Thank you all so very much for reading so far! I love you all!

-Jeff

P.S. - Hey, just asking, does anyone have a favorite post from the first couple ‘o hundred?

All the news that's fit to print

And now, some news stories out there that aren't airline-related tragedies:

Over here, as pointed out on Lindsey's blog, we have a school which suspends students for speaking Spanish.

To your left, we have an excellent article from the Guardian in the UK on why "The Chronicles of Narnia"'s religious propaganda may not fly in Britain.

To your right, Donald Rumsfeld makes claims that just shoot themselves down.

And just behind you, a new exhibit entitled, "Those Who See Fit to Continue Exchanging Liberty for Security."

Straight ahead, the XBox 360, which for the time being, seems to feature prettier games with weaker gameplay.

And, just to p!ss Justin off, WWE has released Tajiri.

A Holiday Joke for You Guys...

This one ain't mine, but it's a good one, anyway...

Q: Why is Christmas just like a day at the office?

A: You do all the work and the fat guy with the suit gets all the credit.

I like this idea...from Caitlin's Blog:

If you read this, if your eyes are passing over this right now, (even if we don't speak often) please post a comment with a COMPLETELY MADE UP AND FICTIONAL memory of you and me. It can be anything you want - good or bad - BUT IT HAS TO BE FAKE.

When you're finished, post this little paragraph on your blog and be surprised (or mortified) about what people DON'T ACTUALLY remember about you.


Interested parties can view my answer over at Caitlin's, where I spilled the beans on the amazing story of our first date. :)

Aeon Flux Review

(WARNING: The following review is basically nothing but one, big spoiler. Ignore this post if you intend to see this movie. Not that, you know, you should.)

“New Rule: In her next movie, Charlize Theron has to be sexy again. We get it. You're a serious actress. Now how about playing a lesbian superhero named Nympho? Or that hot teacher in Florida who bangs her students?” - Bill Maher, “Real Time with Bill Maher,” 10/14/2005

I would officially like to ask Mr. Maher to please stick to commenting on politics and social issues and shut the hell up about the movies. Charlize Theron’s daring belief in lesser projects, what you so off-handedly dismiss as the temptation to be considered a “serious actress,” has brought us films like “Monster” and “North Country”. The desire to objectify her and persuade her to cash in on her looks has now brought us “Aeon Flux.” The phrase, I believe, is “case closed.”

Indeed, “Aeon Flux” gives us few options but to regard Theron for her beauty. She either wears skin-tight outfits or next-to-nothing for virtually the entire running time, and the role she’s in gives her no opportunity (or motivation) to demonstrate her considerable acting skills. Like Halle Berry in the much-maligned “Catwoman,” here is one of the top actresses of her generation, completely reduced to the most superficial of her gifts. The lack of an intelligent story surrounding her merely exacerbates the issue.

The plot, as outlined by a pre-opening series of subtitles, is that in 2011, a massive plague strikes the globe, killing 99% of the human race. Then, “scientists find a cure.” Well, better late than never, I guess. The remaining five million survivors are herded together into a one, big, walled-in mega-city, so that if another plague strikes them, it won’t have to work quite as hard to kill everyone off, I suppose. They are lead by the guy who oh-so-efficiently found the cure in the first place, Dr. Goodchild, who becomes the chairman of this new civilization. And it stays like that for 400 years.

Okay, stop and consider what you’ve just read for a second. 5 million survivors, walled into a single city. Considering the relative amount of population growth on the real Earth in a comparable amount of time, logic states that the number of remaining people should have outgrown that little city in about, say, 50 years, tops. Ah ha, but there is a reason they haven’t we will eventually discover, though why this little factoid has not occurred to ANYONE in the city in all this time, well, that’s anyone’s guess.

Okay, so back to the exposition, which switches to narration rather than subtitles, we meet Aeon Flux (Theron), whose incredible fighting skills are demonstrated as she catches a fly in her eyelid while lying in bed. She informs us that this “perfect society,” which largely consists of people riding around glassy-eyed on bicycles and wearing pseudo-hippy throwbacks, is not as perfect as it appears. Well, duh. It’s actually an oppressive police state, people live in fear, cannot go outside the walls, yadda yadda. Exchange “futuristic” for “primitive,” and basically it’s “The Village” all over again. And no one needs that.

But anyway. Aeon fights for a band of rebels called the Monicans, who communicate through taking pills which stimulate the cortex of their brain and put them in contact with their leader, the Handler, who is played by Francis McDormand and who borrows Napoleon Dynamite’s hairdo. She sends Aeon on her first assignment, to blow up a pool of some kind or something, but really what she’s doing is distracting Aeon from a dinner with her kid sister, Una, so the plot can have her killed off by the Evil Police State.

Now Aeon’s really mad and so forth, so of course, NOW the Handler sends Aeon on a mission to kill Chairman Goodchild (Martin Csokas), who is not the original Chairman Goodchild but is, in fact, the descendant of that Chairman Goodchild, but just happens to look just like the original Chairman Goodchild. As did all his descendants, apparently. With subtle hints like this, when the big surprise is finally revealed, considering all the generations of people who came before them and had access to all the exact same clues, and yet didn’t figure out squat, I was praying that Francis McDormand would look at her hapless charges and say, “I’m not sure I agree with you 100 percent on your police work there, folks.”

So, anyway, Aeon heads off on her mission to kill the Chairman, accompanied by her friend Sithandra (Sophie Okenedo), who has hands for feet and hands for, uh, hands. Aeon breaks in while Sithandra stands guard outside, gets the drop on Goodchild, but when he calls her “Catherine,” she does nothing and gets conked on the head from behind. Yes, the bad-ass female soldier who we’ve seen take out dozens of thugs with barely a thought is subdued by getting called the wrong name. Having been on the wrong end of that type of exchange before myself, though, I can sympathize.

So, anyway, she’s locked up but not killed, escapes without too much fuss, accosts the chairman in his room, and promptly sleeps with him. This would seem to be contradictory to the mission at hand, but anyway. After she wakes up next to him, she chokes him out (and who hasn’t been there?), finds some clues about some unsettling testing that’s going on, and leaves to meet up with Sithandra (who’s shown the patience of Job times 10, waiting outside while all of this was going on). Rather than take the time to explain to Sithandra what happened in there and why she’s so confused, she proceeds to beat Sithandra up, tie her up, and leave her helpless at the bottom of a fountain, with only a small reed to breathe through. But it’s okay, Sithandra mind-melds with the hive of the Monicans, who are dispatched to free her, and only take, oh, 30 minutes or so of screen time to do so.

Anyway, in the meantime, Chairman Goodchild is overthrown by his wussy little brother Oren, and won’t THAT look embarrassing in the authorized history of these events. Goodchild and Aeon hook up (not that way) and go through a few chase scenes before the true nature of the world is revealed: the virus also rendered everyone on the planet sterile, and ergo, the past 400 years worth of generations have been clones, so when someone dies, they are immediately cloned and someone in the city is impregnated with them. This is demonstrated to Aeon through her finding her little sister, who has just been born to a new couple. Okay, wait. Her sister was just killed, like, 2 days ago. So either: a.) they fertilized the woman nine months prior to them even knowing they’d kill Una, and it was just a lucky guess, or b.) that woman went through the FASTEST pregnancy period on record.

Meanwhile, it’s revealed that Goodchild has discovered the cure to the sterility (again showing the crackerjack pace of his scientific revelations, just like how lightning-fast he found that plague cure), but his brother wants things to keep on going as they are, so he can “live forever,” even though it’s just copies of him that live forever and not actually him, but we’re really just picking nits now, aren’t we? Oh, and the backup Monicans FINALLY get to Sithandra, and they inform her of the coup which overthrew Goodchild, so of course Sithandra and company decide to continue with the mission and kill Goodchild anyway, despite the fact that Goodchild has no power anymore and at one point, the guy who IS in charge now is standing right next to him and not a one of them thinks to train their guns on him instead. These aren’t Monicans, they’re Monican’ts.

Oh, and I didn’t even get to the big, golden balloon that flies over the city piloted by Pete Postlethwaite that looks like a cross between the Goodyear Blimp and a Snork.

But enough. The movie is competent enough on a technical level, I suppose, and the action is well done for being as ludicrous as it is, but it’s all in the service of nothing. Karyn Kusama is a talented director, having made the excellent “Girlfight” back in 2000, so we’ll chalk this up as a misstep into the big leagues and hope she moves on.

There’s a movie I’m betting you haven’t seen called “Dark City.” It is also about a group of humans caught in an isolated situation for reasons they do not comprehend, and the struggle to regain free will from their oppressors. But that film is visionary, revolutionary, groundbreaking, intelligent, exciting, moving - in other words, everything “Aeon Flux” isn’t. So, save yourself the two hours and having to go all the way to the theatre, and just rent “Dark City” instead. Or, just come over to my place and I’ll show it to you. I’ll even spring for the popcorn.

Abby Sent Me a Questionaire, But I Refuse to Engage in Chain Mail...So Now YOU Guys Get to Read It!

1. What time is it: 11:39 p.m.

2. Name as it appears on birth certificate: Jeffrey Alan McGinnis

3 Nicknames: Jeff Mac, and that’s pretty much it. Creepy Carl once tried to start calling me McG, but I never even dignified that one with a response.

4. Piercings: Not a one. To quote Red Green, “Be clean and honest, be kind to your neighbor, and try to end life’s journey with the same number of holes you started with!”

5. Most recent movie you've seen in the theatre: “Shopgirl.” Very, very good.

6. Eye color: Brown.

7. Place of birth: Toledo, OH.

8. Favorite foods: Chinese, pasta, turkey, chicken

9. Ever been to Africa? Nope.

10. Ever been toilet papering? Nope, though I have been toilet papered myself. It was a rather sad attempt at it, though…they didn’t even make the trees, the paper just kinda coagulated on the lawn.

11. Ever love someone so much it makes you cry: Yes. Now ask if they loved me back.

12. Been in a car accident:? A few. Rear-ended by a cheerleader (no jokes, please) while leaving high school, ran into a tree, swerved off an icy road and into a guardrail. Damage to cars in all three, no damage to myself. Thank the Flying Spaghetti Monster for that.

13. Croutons or bacon bits:? Bacon bits.

14. Favorite day of the week: Sunday.

15. Favorite restaurant: Chinese buffets, Ryan’s, Magic Wok

17. Favorite sport to watch: Baseball, tennis, boxing. Favorite pseudo-sport: Wrestling.

18. Favorite drink: Diet cola. Brand is insignificant, they’re all the same thing.

19. Favorite dessert: Pecan pie, the single greatest food on planet Earth.

20. Disney or Warner Brothers: Warner Brothers. Give me Bugs Bunny over Mickey Mouse any day.

21. Favorite Fast Food: Magic Wok, as stated. I am a Almond Boneless Chicken whore.

22. What color is your bedroom carpet: Brown-ish.

23. How many times did you fail your driver's test: Once. Well, the mobility part. I hate people who got it all right the first time. Grr.

24. Before this one, from whom did you get your last email: Ruthann. She can’t make it to poker. Le sigh.

25. Which store would you choose to max out your credit card?: Well, it’s already maxed out, but if I had my druthers it’d be at Media Play.

26. What do you do most often when you are bored: Video gaming or reading.

27. Bedtime: Varies wildly, needs to be proceeded by at least a few hours of relaxation and DVD watching.

28. Who will respond to this e-mail the quickest? No one, since it’s not being e-mailed.

29. Who is the person you sent this to that is least likely to respond: My guess is Jeanine would be caught dead before doing one of these things.

30. Who are you most curious about their responses to this questionnaire? No one in particular, really. I like reading most of my friends’ responses.

31. Favorite TV shows: Honeymooners, Twilight Zone, Frasier, Taxi, Siskel & Ebert, Good Eats, Mythbusters, Celebrity Poker Showdown

32. Last person(s) you went to dinner with: Beth, last Monday.

33. Ford or Chevy: They’re both cars. My Ford is currently at 157,000 clicks and doing very well, though.

34. What are you listening to right now: The whirring sound of my computer’s fan.

35. What is your favorite color: Red.

36. Lake, Ocean or river? Lake. Love visiting a park with a lake every once in a while.

37. How many tattoos do you have: Not a one.

38. If you could have any job in the world, what would it be? Film critic, duh.

39. What job would you not like? Personal toenail clipper for Howard Hughes. The benefits may be great but the hours would suck.

40. When you get to the Pearlie Gates, What do you want God to say to you? “What the f*ck are YOU doing here?”

41. Time it took you to finish this e-mail: 23 hours and 18 minutes…I got distracted and am finishing it a day later.

42. How many people are you sending this email to: Not a single one, this baby is blog-bound!