"If" I did it? Yeah, and "if" *I* was fat...

Have you heard about this?

Now, the original source of all this is the "Enquirer," so take it with several handfuls of salt, but I've found supporting reports from several legitimate sources, so, amazingly, it seems to be true.

Yes, apparently Simpson is writing a book describing the murders of his ex-wife and her friend in startling and gruesome detail, outlining how it would have went down if he had done it. But it's all "hypothetical," of course.

Because, to paraphrase Keith last night on his show, it is PERFECTLY ordinary for a man to make 3.5 million dollars for writing a piece of "fiction" about how he would have gone about it if he had decided to murder the woman he loved and her friend.

Sir, kindly go away and never come back. We won't miss you.