Hey, it's an ECW pay-per-view! Buy it! You don't need a card or anything!

When WWE "resurrected" ECW earlier this year, the basic structure of the brand was only being guessed at. Would it run regular house shows (non-televised, for the uninitiated) and pay-per-views, giving it a chance to establish its own identity as a viable brand? Or would it simply be a minor extension of the larger "WWE" entity?

It soon became apparent that in addition to the weekly TV show, ECW would run regular house shows in smaller venues (with some arguing the whole point of bringing ECW back was to run in venues that TNA might have been interested in running in), and also hold bi-annual pay-per-views: the June show One Night Stand, and a December show, "December to Dismember." With only two pay-per-views a year to promote, it was reasonable to expect that the brand would be a more traditionally structured wrestling product, given plenty of time to build and promote their shows, unlike the main WWE brands, which build to at least one show per month.

Well, the "house show" part of the experiment appears to be going the way of the dodo, as they've cancelled almost every individual ECW show and are "merging" the brand's house shows with Smackdown's, promoting "super shows" featuring both brands. And given six months to build characters and construct a card, this is how the December to Dismember PPV, being held on Sunday, is looking:

Elimination Chamber for the ECW Title: Champion Big Show vs. Bobby Lashley vs. CM Punk vs. Rob Van Dam vs. Sabu vs. Test

Special Tag Team Attraction: The Hardy Boyz vs. MNM

The end.

Yep, with SIX MONTHS to build to it, and SIX MONTHS of TV preceding it, the marketing geniuses at WWE have managed to book two, count 'em, TWO matches for a three-hour PPV on Sunday. (And only ONE of those matches ACTUALLY FEATURES ECW PERFORMERS, as neither the Hardy Boyz or MNM even compete for the brand.) The rest of the card at this point is a complete mystery.

Hell, even in the dying days of the REAL ECW, when it was all falling apart and guys were leaving for greener pastures, they'd at least have, say, four or five matches announced. The rest of the card might be a blank slate, but you'd know you were getting SOMETHING.

The experiment is dying, guys. Either put some damn effort behind it or just let it go.

And by the way, is there any match stipulation that has LESS of an "ECW" feel than an Elimination Chamber? You can throw in all the weapons you want, it's still just a over-gimmicked WWE invention.